I assume that for patients with depressive disorder, the unwillingness to break their parents' heart is the most painful struggle between living and death. I've been trying really hard pretending to be happy and I think I've done a good job. Yes, I don't want people to notice my real feelings any more. And you may rest assured because I won't blame my condition on anyone in my life.
It's my 23th birthday. So, I just want some truth for myself.
And don't worry. I will be fine.