Think about what kind of person you're attracted to. Physical appearance likely plays a strong part, of course, as do kindness, humor and other qualities. If you're like me, you're attracted to impressive people. Maybe it's a writer, musician, doctor, lawyer, or soldier. They have qualities I admire but lack myself. Because I assume people with certain qualities would be most interested in those who share them. I don't even consider the possibility of developing a relationship with them.